Signs That Star Trek Is Taking Over Your Life

  1. Saying “make it so” in casual conversation
  2. Indignation because the periodic table doesn’t include dilithium and tritanium.
  3. Able to use “variable phase inverter” in a sentence without excessive thought first
  4. More than one pair of Spock ears on junk drawer
  5. Have figured out the stardate system
  6. Sudden urge to wear lots of Lycra
  7. Scanning shelves at local liquor store for synthehol
  8. The Star Trek theme becomes background music for your dreams
  9. Major quote sources for thesis are Shakespeare, the Bible, and “The Omega Glory”
  10. Memorization of the crew’s authorization codes
  11. Forgetting that present-day elevators don’t have voice interface
  12. Attending a convention wearing non-Terran vestments
  13. Actual serious thoughts about buying that $300 model of the Enterprise from the Franklin Mint
  14. Understanding Klingon
  15. Lecturing any science professor on how transporters work
  16. Playing fizzbin and understanding it
  17. “The Outrageous Okona” seems like a fine piece of writing and dramatic stylistics
  18. Paying rapt attention during those endless special effects sequences in ST:TMP
  19. Inexplicable rock-climbing urges
  20. More than three original episode outlines buried in your drawers