Simplifying the English Language 

Having chosen English as the preferred language in the EEC, the European Parliament has commissioned a feasability study in ways of improving efficiency in communications between Government departments. European officials have often pointed out that English spelling is unnecessary difficult; … Continue reading

Rough Landing 

An airplane pilot had had a particularly difficult flight and a rough landing. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile and give them a ”Thanks for riding … Continue reading

High Blood Pressure 

When a physician remarked on a new patient’s extraordinarily ruddy complexion, he said, “High blood pressure, Doc. It comes from my family.” “Your mother’s side or your father’s?” I asked. “Neither,” he replied. “It’s from my wife’s family.” “Oh, come … Continue reading

Creative Defense 

A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: “My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can … Continue reading

Corporate Stupidity 

“As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday, and employees will receive their cards in two weeks.” (Microsoft Corp. in Redmond WA) “What I need is … Continue reading

The Stella Awards 

The “Stella” awards rank up there with the Darwin awards. Stella Liebeck is the 81 year old lady who spilled coffee on herself and sued McDonalds. This case inspired an annual award: The “Stella” Award – for the most frivolous … Continue reading

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