Computer – CosmoBC.com Jokes http://jokes.cosmobc.com The Blog for Jokes and Funny Stuff! Tue, 10 Dec 2019 01:32:01 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.9.8 Microsoft Air http://jokes.cosmobc.com/microsoft-air/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/microsoft-air/#respond Sat, 07 Dec 2019 15:54:27 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=65 There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives on board. He was coming into Seattle airport through thick fog with less than 10 miles visibility when his instruments went out. … Continue reading

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An Aspiring Writer http://jokes.cosmobc.com/aspiring-writer/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/aspiring-writer/#respond Thu, 05 Dec 2019 18:36:29 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=1313 There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define great, he said, “I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will … Continue reading

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Signs Technology Took Over Your Life http://jokes.cosmobc.com/signs-technology-took-over-your-life/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/signs-technology-took-over-your-life/#respond Tue, 03 Dec 2019 16:40:05 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=68 1. Your stationery is more cluttered than Warren Beatty’s address book. The letterhead lists a fax number, e-mail addresses for two on-line services, and your Internet address, which spreads across the breadth of the letterhead and continues to the back. … Continue reading

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Star Trek Lost Episode http://jokes.cosmobc.com/star-trek-lost-episode/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/star-trek-lost-episode/#comments Sat, 30 Nov 2019 17:49:02 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=728 Picard: “Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able to access their command pathways?” Geordi: “Yes, Captain. In fact, we found the answer by … Continue reading

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A Programmer Joke http://jokes.cosmobc.com/a-programmer-joke/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/a-programmer-joke/#comments Wed, 27 Nov 2019 19:06:44 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=646 Three guys were riding in a car: a hardware technician, a systems analyst, and a programmer. The systems analyst is driving and when they come to a steep hill he finds that the brakes have failed and the car is … Continue reading

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If Operating Systems Ran The Airlines http://jokes.cosmobc.com/if-operating-systems-ran-the-airlines/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/if-operating-systems-ran-the-airlines/#respond Tue, 26 Nov 2019 22:42:13 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=63 UNIX Airways: Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are … Continue reading

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Computer Gender http://jokes.cosmobc.com/computer-gender/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/computer-gender/#respond Tue, 26 Nov 2019 14:23:03 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=60 Why computers should be considered masculine: 1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on. 2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless. 3. They are supposed to help you solve your problems, … Continue reading

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What All Those Acronyms Really Mean http://jokes.cosmobc.com/what-all-those-acronyms-really-mean/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/what-all-those-acronyms-really-mean/#comments Sat, 23 Nov 2019 21:00:24 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=56 ISDN = It Still Does Nothing APPLE = Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity IBM = I Blame Microsoft DEC = Do Expect Cuts CA = Constant Acquisitions CD-ROM = Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months OS/2 = Obsolete Soon, Too. SCSI … Continue reading

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Some Funny Google Fails http://jokes.cosmobc.com/some-funny-google-fails/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/some-funny-google-fails/#comments Fri, 22 Nov 2019 20:21:43 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=543 Google Auto Suggest is, as we can see from its name, an automated suggestion system. It is based on popular search queries. Since there’s a lot of weird people out there, Google will sometimes make some weird suggestions, as shown … Continue reading

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Life Lessons Learned From Video Games http://jokes.cosmobc.com/life-lessons-learned-video-games/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/life-lessons-learned-video-games/#respond Thu, 21 Nov 2019 11:18:24 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=1315 There is no problem that can’t be overcome by violence. You can overcome most adversaries simply by having a lot of quarters. If it moves, shoot it. Piloting any vehicle is simple and requires no training. If someone dies, they … Continue reading

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Funny Resume Bloopers http://jokes.cosmobc.com/funny-resume-bloopers/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/funny-resume-bloopers/#respond Sun, 17 Nov 2019 20:15:41 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=696 Here are my qualifications for you to overlook. REASONS FOR LEAVING THE LAST JOB: Responsibility makes me nervous. They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning. Couldn’t work under those conditions. Was met with a string … Continue reading

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Webcomic: The 10 Stages of Software Development http://jokes.cosmobc.com/webcomic-the-10-stages-of-software-development/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/webcomic-the-10-stages-of-software-development/#comments Sun, 17 Nov 2019 11:52:51 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=337 This webcomic explains the ten stages of software development in a funny way. Each person understood it differently! As a programmer I would have to say that this scenario is pretty often quite accurate. 🙂

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Parachute http://jokes.cosmobc.com/parachute/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/parachute/#comments Sat, 16 Nov 2019 11:05:21 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=633 One night, a Delta twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New Jersey. There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, the Dali Lama, and a hippie. Suddenly, an illegal oxygen generator exploded loudly in the … Continue reading

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30 Funny Twitter Comics http://jokes.cosmobc.com/30-funny-twitter-comics/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/30-funny-twitter-comics/#comments Thu, 14 Nov 2019 13:16:51 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=197 30 Funny Twitter Comics PS. If you do not Tweet you will probably not get this xD

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Why Captcha Are Evil http://jokes.cosmobc.com/why-captcha-are-evil/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/why-captcha-are-evil/#comments Wed, 13 Nov 2019 16:36:03 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=528 This is the proof that captcha are evil! A funny compilation of the web’s funniest and most failed captcha. Now which are we supposed to type? Now how are we supposed to see anything in there!? Now this one is … Continue reading

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Bill Gates Died and Went to Heaven http://jokes.cosmobc.com/bill-gates-died-and-went-to-heaven/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/bill-gates-died-and-went-to-heaven/#comments Wed, 13 Nov 2019 12:22:42 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=58 Bill Gates died and went to Heaven. Saint Peter showed him to his house, a small cottage on a tiny plot in the woods. The closets were full of simple but servicable clothing, and the kitchen was stocked with the … Continue reading

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If Restaurants Functioned Like Microsoft… http://jokes.cosmobc.com/restaurants-functioned-microsoft/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/restaurants-functioned-microsoft/#comments Sun, 10 Nov 2019 22:26:25 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=785 Patron: Waiter! Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I’ll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem? Patron: There’s a fly in my soup! Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won’t be there this time. Patron: No, … Continue reading

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Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/boyfriend-50-to-husband-10/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/boyfriend-50-to-husband-10/#respond Sat, 09 Nov 2019 17:31:56 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=125 Dear Tech Support: Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in the performance of the flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under the Boyfriend 5.0 system. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled … Continue reading

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No Parking Sign http://jokes.cosmobc.com/no-parking-sign/ http://jokes.cosmobc.com/no-parking-sign/#respond Sat, 09 Nov 2019 13:16:41 +0000 http://jokes.cosmobc.com/?p=639 “No parking near my house. Get your own wireless network!”

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